Statistical Soccer

Now that the soccer season is over, it's funny what some people do when they have too much time - they simulate every damn match on the computer to find out whose the best player of course! (And if you were wondering, C. Ronaldo would still be crowned the best player. woot.)


The nation’s top ten players - no arguments


Think about it, if only they could simulate every player's skills into statistics decided by a board of some kind and viola! There wouldn't be 'live' EPL any more - there would be 'virtual' EPL! Imagine all the uncles in the kopitiam tuning in to the CGIs of Man Utd duking it out with some-other-club every weekend, while the players themselves can just sit back and have their well-deserved sunday breaks watching themselves play on a plasma TV somewhere in England.


Of course, if all this were to be true, nobody would watch the EPL anymore, and that includes the ah peks even (no ten, not you. lol.) For all the beautiful graphical technological prowess we possess at the moment to render the players, nobody would give a damn if everything was so darn predictable, which brings me to the main reason why anybody watches 'live' soccer - the sheer unpredictability of each match.


Well, nobody expected Tevez to strut his stuff at West Ham; Cech playing the rest of the season with his head wrapped up like a rugby player; Roy Keane's Sunderland promoting to the EPL after such a disastrous start; Liverpool playing attack-minded football (and winning. lol.); Man City's infallible ability to not score any goals at home; Sheva being a total flop, etc.. - ok maybe some saw the last one coming, but the list goes on and you get the idea.


And so what does it come to at the end of all this? With all the summer buying and speculations going rife only after less than a month of the season's end, i'm sure any soccer fan would be having a mind-boggling experience just imagining what the next season may bring, like for example Man Utd winning the treble. Yeah, that would be good..


Suddenly, the wait for the next dose of soccer frenzy seems so darn far away - and i'm sure you agree.